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So usually I always disclaim how "I am not an expert" on any of the things I write about, I just share my experience.. well for this post. I feel like I am more than qualified based on my resume to consider myself an expert in this arena!

I managed to graduate from high school, college, & law school with a kid in tow & was “crazy” enough to decide to have another baby during law school.  So I think I have more than enough insight and expertise to share.

I want to start by saying this, having a baby in law school IS NOT for everyone! It would be a disservice to not acknowledge that everyone's SITUATION, dynamic and circumstances are different, as such, people should ALWAYS do what works for them.

However; I've been asked more than I can remember now, “what’s it’s like, if I should, & what to expect having a baby in law school” therefore, I am sharing my experience. Be it an aspiring law student, current law student who doesn’t want to wait to begin a family, and even inquisitive attorneys who sometimes ask "how I did it?!” because they just couldn't imagine adding the stress of motherhood or a baby while in law school. Here’s your answer.

Finally writing this post, almost three years post law school graduation, and two years as a practicing attorney to encourage someone else who may be on or considering the journey of law school and motherhood. 

First things first... like I said above; it is NOT for everybody. You have to know yourself and your abilities before consciously or unconsciously decide to have a baby period, & you definitely have to consider what that looks like to do so during such a rigorous course of study if you’re in law school or it’s in your sights.

If you aren’t in law school yet, & you’re still just considering applying, I will be the first to tell you IT IS HARD. Law school is like nothing I’ve ever done before. It’s long nights, it’s lots of reading, it’s lots of information to retain, it requires a ton of time, dedication, money & energy. But if you’re determined to go, determined to get a law degree; law school is doable- “What like it’s hard?!” Lol

For those in law school, you already know what the Journey to JD is like so there’s no need to even speak further about it. Solidarity.

But I will say this, even with a spouse. Even with a baby. Even with a family. Even with no money. Even with no support. You can still go to law school, have a baby, pass the bar & become a successful attorney if that is your goal.

Now back to the point of this post.

The decision to have a baby in law school. - My Case Study

For me it felt like it was only apropos. As I said before, I had a baby in high school, who followed me to college…. so why not have a baby in law school? At this point it's tradition right? OG School Momma. Haha ok, it's not that easy of a choice & definitely wasn’t the easiest journey, however I survived and you can to.

Here are a few things you should consider to determine if it’s the right thing for you.

• Timing. I think the most important aspect of this decision for me was the timing, and there weren’t many other “benefits” better than this.

When it comes to the outlay of your day, having a baby while in law school made the most sense to me. You're not on the clock from 9-5 which means just a tab bit of flexibility, & “freedom.” (I use quotation marks because let’s face it, there is no such thing as freedom in law school, that case law, those books, moot court, trial ad, law review-OWN YOU!) So you’re free “allegedly,” to create a schedule around your classes that fits YOUR school and family needs.

One of the best decisions I made, was to treat law school like a full time job. Your classes will usually fall between the hours of 8am-5pm with breaks in between. Utilizing the "free time" between classes to get work done, prepare for meetings, finish projects, etc. so that when I got home in the evening, I got a break, albeit small- before diving back into my books for the evening, was a game changer. This allowed me to truly have some semblance of balance. Also, when you’re pregnant this room in your schedule allows time for doctors appointments and “naps” when needed lol - Something you can’t take advantage of while working as an attorney full time. 

For me, this was a major factor in considering if we wanted to add a baby during or after law school. It made the most sense for us to take advantage of the flexibility I'd have in my schedule while in school, rather than having to take time off work had we waited until after law school. (Edited to add that although we “planned” this pregnancy for this very reason, God had other plans and I still had another baby my first year as a big girl attorney, a post on that will come later)

• Maternity Leave- in law school there is no such thing as maternity leave. 

You're still responsible for assignments

You're still required to stick to the attendance policy if your school has one.

You don’t get “sick” days or time off so that can be stressful. Not every pregnancy is without sickness or complications so this MUST be a major consideration.

• Health Insurance- You may not have the proper health insurance coverage which can lead to medical debt. I was covered by the insurance at my husbands job. However, we still had to come out of pocket a couple of grand for delivery :( I say delivery because, under the Affordable Care Act, prenatal care (leading up to delivery) is free for most, if not all women.

Some law schools offer a health insurance plan for students that can be rolled into your tuition. But unless you are paying for school without loans, realize this is a loan and money you’ll have to pay back so consider the expense/debt that comes along with this option.

• Childcare - I can’t think if any professional school that offers childcare, babysitting, or any similar service for their students if there is one, comment below so my readers can know :) Once the baby is born, you will have to go back to class, because again there is no maternity leave that won’t delay your graduation date. Unless your partner is a stay at home parent, or you have a live-in relative, chances are you’ll have to find care for your new baby outside the home. This is not always easy. Not only is it a challenge to find reliable caregivers, who are qualified, and will take great care of your baby I’m your absence. . For many moms, leaving their new babies in someone else’s care for 6+ hours a day leads to mental, physical, and emotional stress.

We had our baby in the final semester of my 3L year when my schedule provided much more flexibility than 1L or 2L year. I had classes only 3 days a week and had various breaks in between classes. I was able to partner with a classmate who I trusted who had an alternate schedule. Since we had classes on different days, she watched Ian on the days/times I had class until graduation. Roughly 3 months. She lived very close to campus so I would drop off Ian on my way to campus, with all his essentials. I would have to pump in between classes and would leave the milk with her on pick up for the next time he was over.

We found a system that worked for us, but it was not easy. I went to school just a couple of weeks after delivery (there was a short break in time for spring break) I lived over an hour from campus so car rides with a newborn to three month old was not always an hour. There were stops for diaper changes and feedings, and cuddling on many occasions, which made me have to adjust my schedule as to when I’d leave for class and so forth.

Thankfully we weren’t far from graduation so things weren’t too bad but this can be a huge game-changer for many in their 1L or 2L year.

• Money- Children are expensive I think the newest data out there suggest that it cost a little over $230,000 to raise a child until they are 17 years old. (This is 2020 data) The first year is usually one of the most costly. There are essential baby items you NEED: Car Seats, Basinet/Crib/ Clothing, Formula (if you are not breastfeeding- the formula for babies is EXPENSIVE) & all the other little things that babies need, they add up. So this is certainly something to consider. If you are a full-time law student chances are you do not (because you are not allowed to) have a job, and therefore you are either living off savings, family support, student loans, or a combination of these things. So the cost of having a baby should be one of the main things to account for when making this decision.

I hope that this was helpful, as I said before everyone’s situation is unique and you have to do what is best for you. My goal was to let you know what you should consider, and also, that it is POSSIBLE to do! If you end up on the wild journey of mothering and law school, feel free to contact me to chat via email or social media, I love making Law Mom Friends :)

I think it's partially true when they say : " 1L Year they scare you to death. 2L Year they work you to death. & 3L Year they bore you to death. "

Now to be fair, 2L Year is better than 1L Year because you finally know how to "study, make outlines, survive Finals Week, manage reading for your classes, & have a relatively small "social life" butttttt you also get involved into extra curricular activities. So in my opinion you're choosing to work yourself to death not necessarily the curriculum of law school...  So naturally by 3L year you're a pro st balancing all those things above, but you're also READY to get out of law school! 🤓

Most 3L's find themselves torn between enjoyment and anticipation of graduation.🎓

This can sometimes mean showing up for class, or not. Reading for class, or not. Outlining for finals, or not.  But one things for certain this means you're 5 steps closer to taking the Bar.

A great deal of your 3L year is spent preparing for it. From taking MPRE, (because contrary to popular belief-lawyers do have to be ethical, or at least learn to be) to getting a record of your ENTIRE life in order!!

Ok maybe not the entire thing but close, you know: the exact time you were born, your first grade teachers name, what you ate two years ago on January 3rd, & the fax number for that job you held 8 years ago. Yea. lol point is, it's a lot of detailed information you need for your bar application. 

While your laughing your way through 3L year, here are some things you don't want to forget: 

1.    Start gathering your documentation early. 

Do not wait until the last minute to get all of your documentation in order for your bar application. It's going to take time to have your credit report sent, your DMV transcript delivered, finger prints done, & so much more. Waiting until the last minute is a recipe to miss your application deadline.

Keep in mind however that you don't want to do this too early. Everything "official" that you must submit usually has to be within a 90 day window. So you do not want things to expire before you submit your application. Timing is key. & factor in time for delays, because some states are more difficult than others when it comes to sending people records. 

Oh yea, you also want to time when you take the MPRE perfectly in case you don't pass the bar on the first try (because let's face it- not everyone is One & Done) because that expires eventually too. {varies by state so be sure to Check your jurisdiction}  

2. Choose your Bar Prep Course.

After you decide what state you want to take the bar in, the next thing is to choose a bar prep company: Kaplan or BARBRI are the most popular but there are others.

A lot of companies offer incentives the earlier you sign on, so maybe you took advantage of this during your 1L or 2L year. If not you want to do this as soon as possible 3L year. Most places offer early access to bar prep material so you can get a head start which is great.

Oh & don't forget, you have to spend around $3k on a Bar Prep course, so research & choose wisely. This involves looking at the success rates of others in your particular state that used the same company, & their overall pass rates. & if you don't have the $ now is the time to start asking for money for Birthdays, Christmas, & early graduation gifts. Check you Bar Application expenses as well. Don't be blind sided with $5k in expenses your 3L year. Prepare early. 

3.  Continue to Network

That job you want is not going to just give itself to you. In your third year of law school you should be spending time networking. Don't forget those connections you made interning during your 1L & 2L summers. Hopefully you've kept in contact with job prospects but if not shoot some emails. Keep in contact!! Communication is key, sometimes you can get a job before it's even "posted" if you network properly. 

Do not forget that by 3L year you need to update your resume! Take off things that are no longer relevant that were place fillers during law school. Make sure all your legal clubs & jobs are listed. Lastly, be sure to add WHEN & WHAT State you're taking the Bar in so employers know.  

The time goes goes by fast.  Enjoy every moment. Yes - even with those classmates and professors you are not too fond of, because before you know it you will graduate and never see some of those people again! 

Be sure to enjoy the last days of formal education, for most. Celebrate with your family & friends! & be sure to treat yourself after you sit for the bar. You've worked hard for 3 years . You deserve it. 👏🏽⚖️

"The Roots of Education are bitter but the fruit is sweet." 

So I know I said I'm going to post once a week.. YEA YEA YEA... I've come to realize that right now that may be unrealistic given my obligations to being a full-time Wife, Mother, AND Law Student. Bear with me.

With that being said, I honestly have 2 assignments I should be working on right now instead of blogging, but I'm attempting to some what stay true and committed. So here's to talking about moot court.

Some of you may or may not know what Moot Court is.. I really didn't until law school. But its basically a group of individuals from law schools who enjoy appellate advocacy learning how to properly present cases to a bench of court of appeals judge based on any given issue. This is the fun part to me, considering that before moot court you have to write a "Brief" which is not so brief because its comprised of over 15-25 pages (sometimes longer) of case precedent trying to persuade the judge, why they should rule in your favor before they even see you in court.

We are a small school, my class is comprised of 82 students, and we all knew only 32 would advance to the next round, and then 16 would advance to the semi-final and only 4 would go to finals. I HAD NOOOO PLANS ON ADVANCING, but I was told the further along you go the higher your oral argument grade is for the class. So I joked with my friends that I was "Finna Murder Moot Court" because I wanted all the points lol.

Ok so basically some people have a terrifying fear of public speaking, me not so much. However, when I first heard of this assignment, although I was not nervous, I was annoyed that the judges were going to cut me off before I finished my "points" with thousands of questions... and I HAD TO LEARN HOW TO KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON LOL. 

I practiced a lot with my mentor and a few people who actually compete on the moot court team (These are the cream of the crop.. NATIONALLY they win or place in every competition they compete in) so that I could get some practice with handling those questions, and they all laughed to see me go from cutting them off the first time I practiced, telling them (who were acting as my judges) "as I said before" hahahah they were like noooo Judge will be soooo upset if you say that to them! Oops. To where I was that following week when competition rolled around. 

Ps. Remember I said there are no breaks in Law School, Spring "Break" WAS spent practicing for moot court which began that Monday we got back.  

Any-who the first round, went ok, I had three judges who hammered me out the gate, they didn't even let me finish my intro before they began to throw questions at me, BUT I LOVED IT. hahah It kept me thinking on my feet and as my family always says "I have an answer for everything" I was truly in my element, One of the judges later told me they did that because they saw that I COULD handle it, Go Figure! 

On my way home I just began to praise God, although I had no Idea where I matched up number wise after just the first round, I had confirmation from God that this was my calling, moot court just felt so right, talking to the judges, and advocating for my client was what God created me to do. So I was happy. 

I spent the next day preparing for round two.. Shortly before N and I had lunch together and he let me practice with him being my judge.. (Hilarious to get a Doctor to try and ask legal questions) bahahaha 

 Second Round.. Went the same as the first! The judges HAMMERED ME! But I felt good about it. I had noooooo real plans to advance I just joked around with my friends. Low and behold, we all met in the supreme court room later Thursday night when everyone was done with their second round, to hear the names of the 32 who would advance, because this meant you had to argue again on Friday in front of 3-5 judges. So me and my crew were sitting there, and Prof T says I'm going to call the names in order based on where you rank... 1. Whit R. 2. T. Wallace..... I was so shocked that my name was called so soon it was almost like i didn't hear it, He said ummmm are you present. I was sitting right in his face lol I said ohhhhh yea! He said well what argument do you want to chose, I WENT WITH WHAT WS ON BRIEF" Defendant actual knowledge" this was THE HARDEST argument to make in the competition, but I wanted to challenge myself!

 SHOCKED IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT REALLY. I wanted to advance but I had no Idea I'd come in second place out of the top 32, that just felt awesome!

The next day was the same thing, I argued in from of three judges in the quarter final round and came out as one of the top two amount the four in my room.. which meant morrreeee arguing, AT THIS POINT I was sooo Tired and ready for it to be over.

Now we get to the semi final round and only 1 person from each room would advance, and there was a panel of 5 judges, I emphasize the amount of judges because this means more questions from more people, that you have to keep up with, answer, and attempt to get back to the point you were trying to make. This time I was a little nervous, thankfully my husband was there to cheer me on. Letting me know that I'm better under pressure, and I've been here before (One of my favorite sermons from Pastor F)

Just like the other rounds, I handled it well. Did not advance ;( but I felt great knowing I fell short by one two points, both the guy who advanced and I won two judges and then the tie breaker judge chose him by two points! That was great. Not only did I not plan to advance, I certainly didn't think I would be in the top 4. So to come in 2 and lose in the semifinal round, made me happy! AND I GOT THE MAXIMUM AMOUNT OF POINTS FOR THE GRADE EITHER WAY so hey whats there to complain about.

It was sooo much fun, and the Professor who runs moot court said one of the judges was shocked I didn't make the final 4 :)

Everyone keeps asking if I PLAN TO JOIN THE MOOT COURT TEAM, and as of now I say IDK but I do no, no I don't plan to join. However they are having a meeting and serving chipotle Monday so I will be there for the free grub. lol

I'd rather join trial team and given my family life--- with all the traveling I cant do both, but I MURDERED MOOT COURT! :)

Ok so seeing as though I started this blog to document my journey in law school, its only right that I give a review as I'm nearing the finish line of my first year!

I have been gone wayyyyyy to long. Sorry. Law School will do that to you, but I will try my best to keep updates going. Weekly :)

I'm currently writing this post in what is suppose to be an "Assessment DAY" from what I know its an hour long survey so the law school can "see how its doing". Well as you see I'm not participating. "Im only here" for the free lunch ticket they will provide when its over.. Which brings me to my first point!

• Meetings are your friend! - OK SO no one really enjoys sitting in long seminars or boring meetings listening to speakers, but what you will learn is that almost all law schools cater to their guest, in a literal sense, so as a reward for attending you get free food at most of these events which is a winnnnn! This may not seem like "much" but as a law student trust me its a gift from God! & You also do sometimes get to network and meet great people who can help you along the way!

• CONSIDERATION... before law school if someone where to ask me what that meant I'd have a totally different meaning.{If you decide or have attended law school you know what I mean or you will learn} Upon completing Contracts I (MY FAVORITE CLASS- or maybe its just my professor and I'm bias. Whatever. Rice Rocks!)... my appreciation for consideration has changed, and I'm looking for it in every promise or statement given by someone! hahah Which leads me to my last point for now....

• Torts is tortious! As a 1L you learn what a "Tort" is and then you begin to see them everywhere. It literally changes the way you maneuver through life. I know for me it has, as well as some of my classmates. You view life through a different lens, causing you to be wayyy more careful, which I guess can be a good thing.

But whats not a "Good Thing" .. is that fact that in law school there is no such thing as a

BREAK

.. No really they are all "

Illusory

" They gave us a "fall break" so I thought, ----- that was a time to prepare for midterms 1st semester... THEN-  I kept hearing everyone say "On Thanksgiving break" you want to shorten your outlines... I didn't realize this meant that on Thanksgiving Break, you could only afford to take a "Break" for about two days to enjoy all the food and family, because upon returning ughhhhh your hit with 1st semester finals! BRUTAL.... THATS ALL I WILL SAY FOR NOW ABOUT FIANLS.. BRUTAL. 3 HOURS OF Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress. {For Each Test}

And not to mention spring break... If you're anything like me when you think "Spring Break" you remember undergrad and taking trips to the beach and having fun.... well Um yea.. In law school, you can do that but you probably will carry along with you 60lbs of books instead of a bikini. 

Spring Break while relaxing because we didn't have class every day was really an opportunity for us to get to work on our outlines.. {Outlines... are your lifeline in law school- you learn to love them} & preparing for moot court! ... I will talk more about that in my next post! 

Theres so much I have to say but I need to cut it short.. Its almost time to pretend to do the survey so i CAN GET FREE FOOD! 

I feel so relieved with this update. I've been gone way too long. So much has changed! God has been blessing my family and although law school is hard and every other day I want to quit, I'm so happy to be living out my dream!

Soooo I have some great news... Although I'm sure you probably already know what this is "I GOT ACCEPTED INTO LAW SCHOOL" To God be the Glory! 

Although I've worked so hard over the past 6 months of my life to get to this point I still can't believe this is now a reality. (&& that I can put the LSAT behind me for the rest of my life) !!!!!!!! 

On Monday as a Family we "Touched & Agreed" as the bible instructs us to do... & great things started to happen the next day for my family.. My confirmation came two days later while I sat at my desk at work and recived an email, as I thought with the LSAT, I heard it go off and something in me knew what it was. 

I opened it about 10 minutes later and I saw a message from one of my Two First Choices.

It had only been about a week and a half since I submitted my application to them so I was completely shocked to hear from them this soon. I had to get up and text Doc W "answer your phone, it's an emergency" because I needed to share my great news with him first! ( I contemplated on using the word emergency .. But I figured hey if the hospital can make you run when you hear that word... I should be able to too.. I know Evil, hahahah judge me later). 

I ran from my desk to call him...&& we screamed and praised God together. 

I later shared with my family the news and everyone offered sincere congrats. 

I'm so excited to actually be able to say I am going to Law School in 2014! This will be the greatest 25th Birthday Gift everrrr! This journey is going to be challenging and I'm ready to embrace that. I look forward to all that God has in store for me and this next chapter in life :-) 

I will continue to keep my readers posted and I look forward to sharing the journey with you all! 

So as I mentioned before, instead of refreshing my email every 5 seconds after taking the #LSAT, I was actually productive while playing the waiting game.

I used the time waiting on my scores to ensure my letters of recommendations were received and processed by LSAC, I began filling out my applications with all the information that I could, and I worked on the final edits of my personal statement.

I would encourage you to do some of these same things during your waiting game. It not only alleviates stress, but depending on the time you apply, it positions you for early admissions to your top choices. (Grant/Scholarship opportunities, and it allows you to gain entrance before the slots are tight).

(Writing your personal statement while your studying for the LSAT is helpful also, it takes your mind off of the daugnting test for a second, and reminds you of how awesome you are and why again your actually "studying" to get a good score to gain entrance into law school)

** Make sure you get your statement proofed by everyone you know! (ok not everyone) I started with an unbiased friend who has written several book over the past few years. Then I passed it along to my boyfriend who allowed one of his fraternity brothers who is currently a practicing attorney, to proof it. I made revisions and edits where necessary and recommended, and then solicited my sisters best friend who is an esteemed publicist for one of the local school districts to make the final edits, to ensure everything came together, that it made sense, and that there were no grammatical errors, the previous editors missed **

Once she gave this to me, I was ready to go! My applications had already been completed many in which the personal statement was the only thing missing. I am currently going through the

Process,

 I submitted applications today to my top choices, and I look forward to hearing from them in the coming weeks!!!

Its October 1st! YAY... Soooo the countdown is so real, I have officially 3 more days until  the LSAT.

While I'm still nervous and feeling unprepared... I'm ready for this phase to be over so I can focus on my applications, recommendation letters, and officially getting my life back!

Tomorrow I am going to take my final (Prep- Test) ... and then rest my mind until saturday. My brain has gone on complete overload. Its funny how the roles have reversed, just a few months ago my boyfriend was preparing for Step 1 board exams and I was there to encourage him when he felt defeated and now its my turn, he's certainly the voice of reason. Im having as he would call them "Knowledge Nightmares" ... I just can't escape the LSAT. Oddly enough I feel like once its over I will miss it, bittersweet.

Hopefully Doc W, comes into town this weekend to celebrate with me POST TEST, (I wont get my hopes up, I completely understand the demands of his Peds rotation that is 7 hours away) I will certainly need a massage and a glass of wine before the weekend is over.

Fortunately, I will start back working on Monday so that will keep me occupied instead of refreshing my email every 5 seconds looking for my lsat results.

At this point I am completely over the LSAT and studying for it. My brain is exhausted, yet I still have two practice test according to my schedule before the real deal.

I will attempt to do a timed test Today, and Wednesday, then officially rest my brain... with the exception of a few practice sections (not a full test) until saturday!

Only 5 More days!

On a lighter note:  Today is the Last Day of September... Yes, ALREADY I know I was just saying goodbye August, Hello September...

Time is certainly flying by, the weather tried to change last week, but this weeks anticipated temps are kinda summery. Bummer, I get so excited in the spring and fall, my favorite seasons. I love to layer, and look chic. Not too much of a summer fan, because I hate having on clothes in the heat, and the cold is no fun. I'm an in between kind of girl! Can't wait to fully embrace the weather and wardrobe change!

Goodbye September, Hello Fall.